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Hadhrat Moulana Maseehullah Khan Rahmatullahi alaihi mentioned:
Moulana Ashraf Ali Thaanwi Rahmatullahi alaihi’s treatment towards his wives was very good and exemplary.
However women are women, somewhere and sometime some words exit the mouth so in such instances, he would let it just pass, when such instances arise then he would not be hasty in acting but rather postpone the matter.
This was whether food is prepared on time or not, whether food is cooked on time or not, he would never utter a word.
If by chance the chillies ever happen to turn out too hot, then too he would not say a word. He would just say, bring a little sweets meats. My way has stayed like this too. I cannot remember a time where I said, “cook for me this”. If anything out of place was said from her side, it was ignored.
I thought to myself, let it be, she has come leaving her own four walls, her mother’s lap, and her father’s shoulders.
She has left the home where she was raised and comes to a strange place; this is a great sacrifice of hers, and also a great sacrifice of her parents. Therefore, when she leaves her home and departs, she goes with tears.
O man! Think for a moment, if Allah Ta’laa had made you a woman, you would understand, then why don’t you feel compassion for that poor woman?
Now that she has come here within the four walls to you, if you do not take pride in her, then in whom will you? Then why shouldn’t a husband feel devoted to her honour?
My brother, think a little. Accordingly, Hazrat Wala Hakimul Ummah Rahmatullahi alaihi narrated about a person who had made many complaints about his wife, whereby Hadhrat Wala said:
اس کی بے عدولی پر صبر اور تمہاری طرف سے عدل
Exercise patience upon her shortcomings and from your side, there should be justice.
Pg 458, Hayaat-e-Maseehul Ummat
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